27 July 2012

Replaceable Date


It’s kind of bothersome that you think I’m that easily replaceable. Like, I was married to her for 10 years (yawn), she raised my 3 banshees (yowl), she was the breadwinner (ya-hoo!) and now, I’ll just snuff her out and start over, as if she didn’t exist.

Wait. Not so fast, buster boy.

I matter. And you can’t pretend all that time didn’t matter, even if you forgot to pack up any physical reminders like photos of the kids, or your clothes and stuff. Yeah, yeah, so you were in a hurry. I got that.

And you have new, better physical reminders now! Like your 4 cars, 4 flatscreen TVs, hilltop house, swimming pool and new plaid wardrobe. The parties, the built-in babysitters so you never actually have to spend time with your kids, your gf’s shiny bleached white teeth. (How long until that bleached taste goes away? Last time I sucked on bleach I made some terrible errors. I think it caused lasting brain damage.)

So you may think you can substitute these semi-precious assets for old, tattered, battered me. 


Just remember, you have it all now, but you can’t take it with you. It’s an illusion.

You end up exactly as you are. Poof.
You made your bed - now, sleep in it!

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